Jermain Defoe had not scored a Premier League goal in over a year before Sunday’s matchup against Wolves. Now he has two, and they were both bee-ee-ay-yootiful. The first was a stunning curler after a give and go with Roman Pavlyuchenko. The second was an instinctual shot placed into the top corner. Unstoppable describes both goals perfectly.

It’s not often you hear someone say, “Hey, did you see that West Brom/Birmingham match?” But you should be saying that exact line around the water cooler on Monday. The first half was somewhere on the abysmal side of abysmal, but the second forty-five was wide open, and James Morrison had the biggest highlight with some sweet control and a fiery finish.

There’s so much to love about Liverpool’s opener against Manchester United. There is Berbatov’s muffed clearance. Then there is United’s complete lack of organization in the back, then there is Luis Suarez dancing (and I mean dancing) through four United defenders before tapping the ball past van der Sar for Kuyt to finish in a wide open net. Also, there is van der Sar running after the assistant referee, presumably to ask if he had taped that goal on his cameraphone. Because it was awesome.

Samuel Eto’o: Still amazing. He can play up the middle like a central striker, he can play on the wing like a wide forward, he can play on a counterattacking team like Mourinho’s Inter Milan, he can play on a possession team like Guardiola’s Barcelona, he can beat a defender with speed or power, and he can place a shot like an Olympic archer. Also, he seems to be on the exact same page as the playmaker on his team. All the time. Just ask Sneijder. On Sunday, Eto’o didn’t need any assistance to score his second of the day. He muscled a Genoa defender off the ball then pulled off a few tricks before finishing to solidify Inter as the major challenger to AC Milan’s title run.

Madureira’s Rodrigo and FC Zwelle’s Albert van der Haar probably each thought they had the goal of the week. Both players nailed audacious shots from around the half line.

Cristian Maidana of Huracan apparently knows nothing about geometry, because he aims for goal from a crazy angle. He must, however, know a lot about soccer because he absolutely nails the shot.

Finally, Giuseppe Rossi (the Italian Jozy Altidore) saved a point for Villareal with a sweet free kick from close range.